In Romans it says. . .

I love Paul's letters and yet am supremely intimidated by them. First, Paul is arguably the single most influential missionary and prolific church planter the world has ever known. On top of that, he has this amazing, logical, highly-educated brain that would have served him well as an attorney in 21st Century America. He has a mastery of the Law of Moses, The Prophets, and the Gospel that would make everyone from Billy Graham to John Wesley to Martin Luther feel like a simpleton.

And yet, Paul is humble. He is compassionate. He is loving. He is graceful. He longs not to demonstrate his mental and theological prowess, but to spread the good news that the salvation Jesus brought is for everyone. In this way, Paul is a very of the people kind of guy.

So, as I study through Romans again, I'm imagining that I live in Rome. I'm imagining that this letter is written directly to me, that it was delivered to my house, that I was the one who broke the seal and unrolled the scroll for the first time. I'm also reading it out loud, the way the original recipient certainly did repeatedly in countless gatherings of disciples. I don't do this nearly enough, especially considering how powerful it is when I do. I'm not sure how long I will be here. I suppose until I figure out how to live out what is written.

This time through I am reading both the NIV and The Message paraphrase. The Message is particularly powerful for me when read out loud because it is put into language that is familiar to my ears. As was read the first five chapters this morning, I was stopped in my tracks by verse 4 in chapter 2. Here is the way it is rendered in the Message.

God is kind, but he’s not soft. In kindness he takes us firmly by the hand and leads us into a radical life-change.

For me, that one verse sums up the message of all of Paul's letters. God is not our doting Grandpa who we can manipulate, coerce, and take advantage of. But, neither is he the slave-driving, task-master who is anticipating our failure in order to derive pleasure from punishing us. He is kind and loving and forgiving, but if our encounter with this kindness does not lead us to repentance and radical life-change, then it wasn't his kindness we encountered.

It is also important to note (and Paul hits on it several times just in the first five chapters) that it always happens in this order. Encounter God, lead a changed life. We don't lead a changed life in order to encounter God. We come before him worthless, powerless, filthy, and bankrupt. He welcomes us in our brokenness and fills us with life, meaning, and purpose.

This will be something that I continue to chew on. God is kind, but he is not soft. I hate to admit to how many times I have treated God like he was soft, trying to manipulate and coerce him. I hate how many times I have, not in my words but in my actions, said, "oh, he'll forgive me. it's ok just this once."

God, today I chose to follow you into that radical life-change. I'm so grateful for this gentle strength that you offer me. Today, I embrace life on your terms. Today, I choose to obey, to follow, to acknowledge in my words and actions that you are my King.

And yet. . .

My thoughts are brief today. Isaiah goes on for the first half of chapter 30 about how terrible, rebellious, and devious the people are, how deserving of punishment. And then we get this verse.

Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you;
    therefore he will rise up to show you compassion.

This is the good news. Focusing on God's love and compassion is not watering down the gospel. If anything his love and compassion is stronger and more powerful in the light of a proper understanding of our sin and brokenness. When someone is kind to someone who is kind to them first that's not news, that's Tuesday. But, when someone is kind, loving, gracious, and sacrificial in the face of rebellion, deciet, betrayal, and ridicule, that is strong, powerful love.

It is that kind of love that is lavished on us, and it is that kind of love that we are called to lavish on every single person we encounter. Those are some big shoes to fill.

Isaiah's gone to meddlin'

The further I delve into Isaiah's book this time around, more convinced I become that it's not the historical context and figurative language that keeps people from engaging the prophets. I think they hit too close to home. I think that people understand that Isaiah has (as my family in Texas would say) quit preachin' and gone to meddlin'. He's stepping on toes. He's pointing out our role in God's anger and frustration. He's pointing out the bad choices and outright rebellion that we are guilty of. Take chapter 29 for example.

You turn things upside down,
    as if the potter were thought to be like the clay!
Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it,
    “You did not make me”?
Can the pot say to the potter,
    “You know nothing”?

 Isaiah is not saying anything new. Through him, God is pointing out that the disconnect between himself and humanity has not changed since Adam and Eve took the fruit. The disconnect, the thing that breaks our relationship with our creator is our desire to be in charge, to worship ourselves, to suggest that we don't need him and are not in debt to him. But God is not like that kid in 3rd grade who reminded you every five seconds that you owed him a quarter and you need to pay him back because it's his milk money and if he doesn't get it back he won't have any milk today and he really needs his quarter because he really likes milk. That's not who God is. He's not a nag. He doesn't NEED anything from us. He WANTS a relationship with us. He wants to be intimately connected to us. He wants to be known by us in the same way that he already knows us. He wants to redeem and restore us. And none of this is for his benefit. It's all for our benefit because he is incomprehensibly loving and gracious.

Look at how the chapter ends. This is always the goal. Sometimes our rebellion is at a point where his methods must be severe, but this is always the goal of God intervention in the lives of humans.

No longer will Jacob be ashamed;
    no longer will their faces grow pale.
 When they see among them their children,
    the work of my hands,
they will keep my name holy;
    they will acknowledge the holiness of the Holy One of Jacob,
    and will stand in awe of the God of Israel.
 Those who are wayward in spirit will gain understanding;
    those who complain will accept instruction.”

Reconciliation. Redemption. Restoration. Salvation. Healing. This is God's relentless pursuit of humanity. He longs to help us understand that to admit our weakness, to admit our dependence on him, to admit our flaws and failures is the only way to be strong, the only way to actually live.

Afraid of the Prophets

I never met Isaiah, Malachi or Jonah in person, but I feel confident saying that they were most likely rather intimidating individuals. When you combine the speaking for God with knowing the scripture by heart, following all the rules of Moses, and often living austerely in the desert, it makes for a powerful impression. I've often allowed this thinking to steer me away from studying the prophets. There is just so much to take into account. There is historical context, translation issues, cultural differences, figurative language and ancient predictions. If you let it, it can all be very intimidating. But then you read it, and you realize that God still speaks through Isaiah and Jeremiah today. You realize that the Gospels have so much more power and significance when they are connected to the generations of faithful who came before.

I've begun a trek through the prophets. I'm currently about halfway through Isaiah. I've come to a place where I'm ok with the fact that there are layers and details that may escape me for the remainder of my life. I will continue to dig, search, and study. I've chosen to focus on the fact that God is faithful to reveal himself even in the face of my ignorance. In fact, the only cure for my ignorance is to listen to his voice and allow him to continue to reveal himself to me.

I've said it before, but I'll say it again. The only people who think that God is violent based on the events recorded in the Hebrew scriptures are those who haven't read it for themselves. The image of God revealed by Isaiah is consistent with (and regularly points directly to) the image of God revealed in the person of Jesus. We are met with a God who, in the face of disobedience, rebellion, and complete rejection, still longs to lavish his love, grace, and salvation on humanity. We are met with the one true God who knows us more than we can understand and to be known by us.

Weak and Rebellious

Did I mention that I love Romans? I've been really enjoying it afresh by reading it in the Message and then re-reading it in the NIV. A kinds of fun fireworks are going off in my brain. Check this out.

Christ arrives right on time to make this happen. He didn't, and doesn't, wait for us to get ready. He presented himself for this sacrificial death when we were far too weak and rebellious to do anything to get ourselves ready. And even if we hadn't been so weak, we wouldn't have known what to do anyway. We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him. 

I don't think that I can hear that too many times. We were weak, and what little strength we had we devoted to rebelling against him, resisting his plan and discounting his authority. And then he sacrificed his son for us. That just doesn't get old. Humanity deserved death, and yet we received life. Then there is that last line. Christ died for us "while we were of no use whatever to him." This was not a strategic move. This was not God building up his resources, adding some valuable assets to his cause. We were worthless to him. This did not improve his portfolio. This was an expenditure, not an investment.

God let me follow your example. Let me spend my life the way that you did and do. God, I want to pour out the life that you provide without an expectation of a return, without an expectation of some kind of payback. Release me from an investment mentality, and lead me in your extravagant, prodigal (check out Timothy Keller's book Prodigal God if this confuses you) ways. Lead me to sacrifice myself for people while they are still sinners so that your life and power might flow through me and into them. Amen.

In Romans it says. . .

Wow, God knew I was going to need some Romans this morning. I love this letter. It's at the same time high theology and passionate love letter. As I've read through the New Testament this time, I've often switched to the Message paraphrase to give me a fresh take on scripture I've read many times before. I did that this morning and got so wrapped up that I read an extra chapter. I just couldn't stop reading. It's all still marinating a bit, and there is so much good stuff here. I'll just whet your appetite with a small morsel and hopefully you will dive in an read it for yourself.

In chapter 4, Paul gives a great dialogue on Abraham. This is certainly appropriate since he is addressing Jewish readers. Peterson translates verse 17 this way.

We call Abraham "father" not because he got God's attention by living like a saint, but because God made something out of Abraham when he was a nobody.

 I know this. I've know this for a long time. And yet, I'm constantly trying to get God's attention with my good deeds. I'm constantly trying to earn what he's already freely given me. I'm constantly trying to deserve what is only available as a gift of grace.

God, I'm a nobody, but I'm your nobody. I belong to you, not because of my worth, but because of your choice. Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for choosing humanity. Thank you for choosing creation. Today, I choose to live in response to your gift rather than tying to earn your favor. Amen. (Let it be so!)

As he went along

I'm always reminded when I read the gospels that Jesus was never in a hurry. He had a sense of urgency about proclaiming the message of the Kingdom of God, but he was never in a hurry. Whenever he was interrupted, he stopped and dealt kindly with the interruption. Even when he was specifically headed to an appointment, he never hesitated to stop and interact with people along the way.

I'm beginning to think that this is not just a ministry style, but this relaxed pace, this refusal to be in a hurry is a characteristic of God revealed in Christ. During creation, God could have just done it all in one micro-nano-second or less. But instead, he took his time. He was deliberate. He was not in a hurry. This is difficult for me, because I struggle with this. I'm from the digital generation. I want it yesterday. If my computer or phone takes more than one second to do what I tell it, I get frustrated.

God, I want to reflect you in every way, every part, every characteristic. Jesus, let me model this refusal to be in a hurry in the say way that I seek to love, share grace and extend mercy.